


Love Me All Up

by foggynelson



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M, where everyone is human and super gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-04-18
Packaged: 2018-06-03 02:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6592141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foggynelson/pseuds/foggynelson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jace is having a panic attack and with their boyfriend, Simon, away at band practice, it's up to Raphael to save the day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love Me All Up

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hawwkgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawwkgirl/gifts).



> Written for a prompt given to me on tumblr. I didn't realize how good this ot3 was until now but wow do I need more.

Raphael has never been good at this. Even with his own family, showing comfort and love was a struggle for him. He wishes he was more outwardly compassionate, more caring in ways that were tangible and physical, that someone could point at and reference. 

Especially here, now, as Jace is having a panic attack. It’s rare for Jace and Raphael to be alone together. They spend a lot of time together, but rarely without at least Simon by their side. And Simon was supposed to be here, the three having plans to go out for dinner, but Simon’s band practice was running late and Maureen was not going to let Simon leave any time soon.

Raphael knows, though, that if he just contacted Simon, told him what was going on, Simon would be here as fast as humanly possible. Only Raphael doesn’t want to bother Simon; he knows how much he loves his band practice, how playing his guitar and singing are two things that made him feel pure happiness.

So instead, Raphael stands in front of Jace and asks, “What can I do?”

Jace is breathing so fast and so rapidly that he can’t seem to get any words out, only the start of ones leaving his lips. Raphael racks his brain and tries to remember what it is Simon does to help Jace. He remembers something and reaches out, grabbing hold of Jace’s shaking hands. They continue to shake as Raphael laces his fingers with his.

“Is this helping?” Raphael questions, looking Jace in the eye. Jace manages a small nod. Raphael isn’t sure if he’s telling the truth, though, as his breathing hasn’t changed and Jace is sweating now, too.

Raphael continues to try remember what Simon does. Jace has only had a panic attack in front of him twice before and the whole thing had made Raphael uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable because of anything Jace was doing, but just himself, uncomfortable with his inability to do anything, to help. He was in such awe of Simon, who spoke with such a kind and loving voice, smiling his sweetest smile at Jace.

“Do you have any medication?” Raphael thinks to ask. Jace nods. “Where is it?” 

It takes a moment, but Jace manages to say, “Bathroom cabinet.”

“I’ll be right back.” Raphael gives Jace’s hands a light squeeze before making his way to the bathroom. He opens the cabinet and pulls out a few pill bottles until he finds one whose directions are ‘take as needed for panic attacks.’ Raphael grabs a pill and runs to the kitchen, getting water for Jace. 

He hands Jace the pill, who takes it, and Raphael helps hold on the cup as Jace drinks down the water. Raphael has no idea how fast the medication is supposed to work. He knows it’s not some magic trick where two seconds later Jace is all better, but Raphael hopes it can work fast - for Jace’s sake.

Raphael remembers something else Simon did and, after grabbing hold of Jace’s hands again, he says, “Okay, let’s try and focus on your breathing. Try and breathe in and out when I say, okay? You can do it. Focus on my voice and listen to me.” Raphael continues on, saying “In” and “Out,” helping Jace slowly get bigger and bigger breathes. He wishes his voice was softer, sweet like Simon’s. It’s not, but it still seems to help some.

This goes on for about ten minutes, Raphael guiding Jace until he seems to be more stable. He’s standing straighter and his hands are no longer shaking. 

“Thank you,” Jace says, his voice just a little raspy. “I’m feeling a lot better.” Raphael nods, so grateful to hear the words.

The two sit down on the edge of Jace’s bed and Raphael is surprised when Jace lays his head against his shoulder. They’re rarely this intimate, this physically close to each other. Raphael is surprised by how much he likes the other’s presence.

“Remember when we first met?” Raphael asks. “Remember how much I hated you?”

“Are you saying you don’t hate me now?” Jace jokes with a laugh.

Raphael smiles slightly. “Simon was so excited to introduce me to his super cool boyfriend and I was, ya know, jealous as fuck. I wanted nothing more than to punch the smile off your face that you made when you saw Simon. You two hugged and kissed and then Simon introduced me to you and you were… so nice. I was so surprised.

“You shook my hand and then pulled me into a hug and said something about how Simon had been non-stop gushing about me and how you were so excited to meet me. I don’t think I ever told you, but I really admired you for that. I feel like a lot of people would be okay with their boyfriend wanting another boyfriend, too.”

“Well, it’s not like there was any way I was gonna say no to Simon,” Jace chuckles. “And I thought if he loved you, you couldn’t be that terrible. I was obviously wrong on that front.”

“Hey!” Raphael responds, laughing.

“You’re actually pretty great,” Jace says. Raphael smiles wide. The two are quiet and simply enjoy being next to each other until Simon arrives just a bit later.

“Oh wow hey guys,” Simon greets the two. “You two doing all right?”

“Jace had a panic attack,” Raphael replies.

“Aw no! You should have told me; I would have been home sooner.” Simon sets his stuff down near the door and walks over, joining the two on the bed. He puts his arm around Jace and pulls him close. Jace places his head against Simon’s chest and melts into him. Simon uses his free hand to reach out to Raphael and holds his.

They stay like this for awhile. Eventually, Jace lifts his head and straightens up. “You guys still wanna go out for dinner?” Simon questions then.

“Not really,” Jace replies. “If that’s okay with you guys,” he adds, his eyes shifting back and forth between the two.

“Fine by me,” Raphael says. 

“Me too. Did you have something else in mind?” Simon asks.

Jace nods. He stands up and pulls the covers down on his bed. He then lies down and says, “Come here, you two.” And they do, each lying down on one side of Jace. Raphael wraps his arms around Jace’s torso, pulling him close. On the other side, Simon moves his body as close to Jace’s and places his arms around him, his right hand lying on top of Raphael’s shoulder.

They stay like this for awhile and then proceed to shift around so Raphael is in the middle and then Simon in the middle and then back to Jace again. They don’t talk much, mostly just hold each other, focusing on the warmth and love that’s emanating from each of them. 

“I love you,” Raphael says at one point when Simon and him and lying face to face. Simon blushes deeply. Raphael turns his head towards Jace and says, “I love you, too.” Raphael loves saying the words. He repeats them over and over again, whispering, “I love you,” in both in English and Spanish. The others join in as well, expressing their love with fervor.

They fall asleep like this, bodies tangled and love dangling from their lips.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!! Please let me know what you think and come talk to me on [tumblr](http://andvsamberg.tumblr.com/). Oh! and send me [prompts](http://andvsamberg.tumblr.com/prompt-page) too.


End file.
